Moms: Should They Go To Work?

This week in my Family Relations class, we discussed work and home. We discussed the changing patterns of working such as women in the labor force, married women and employment, marital and family status of employed women, types of dual-career families, reasons why women work outside the home, home versus the workplace, the challenges of dual-income families, the satisfaction dual-income families, and work and well-being. Today, I want to focus on mothers in the labor force and whether or not they should work or stay home. According to the book "Marriage and Family the Quest for Intimacy," nearly six out of ten women aged sixteen and above are now in the labor force. Also, sixty percent of working mothers said that part-time work would be their ideal. Even though the proportion of working mothers who want full time has decided, most would still like to stay working. Some of the reasons why women want to work is because they want to be able to afford more things, the desire for financial security, the opportunity to develop the instrumental part of themselves and to establish a sense of self apart from a man and children, economic independence, increased self-esteem, and better overall health. I can see why many women would want to work but personally I want to be a stay at home mom. My mom was a homemaker and I am so grateful for that. It was so nice having my mom around and I think that is one of the reasons why we have always been so close. I want to have that same relationship with my children. Roughly 61 percent of pre-kindergarten children receive some kind of non parental child care on a regular basis. There are two challenges that face the couple who opt for child care. One is the challenge of finding satisfactory care and the other is the challenge of spending sufficient time parenting. I really like this because I do feel like I learned a lot more than what I would if my mom was always gone working.

Conflict In Marriage

This week in my Family Relations class, we talked about conflict. I want to focus on conflict in marriage. Sometimes there is just going to be fights between spouses. In the book Marriage and Family the Quest for Intimacy, it talks about how there are eight principles that couples in happy marriages use to engage in constructive conflict. They are:maintain your perspective, develop tension outlets, avoid festering resentment, be sensitive to timing, communicate without ceasing, be flexible and willing to compromise, use conflict to attack the problem and not your spouse, and keep loving while you are fighting. These principles can help make the marital conflict is good fighting rather than destructive fighting.

Infidelity

Today in my Family Relations class we were discussing infidelity. My teacher made a connection between an old vinyl record and marriage. Even though a vinyl record doesn't sound quite as perfect as a digital cd, we still really enjoy the sound of the vinyl. This relates to marriage because even though our marriages aren't perfect, we still prefer the imperfect marriages to the perfect ones. If we had perfect marriages, then there would be know room to grow. You wouldn't be able to become closer to your spouse because, I believe, you grow closer when you have to go through trials together. That is why we shouldn't try to seek out a sexual relationship with someone other than your spouse, or even become emotionally attached to someone else. Some people will say that my husband/wife wasn't paying any attention to me or that they weren't emotionally there for me. They may then have a fling with someone, or become emotionally attached to someone else. This is a mistake because even if you leave your husband/wife for your new lover, everything's not always going to be sunshine and daisies then either. You have to realize the importance of your relationship with your spouse is and appreciate the little things that you do have. Having an affair will not make you feel fulfilled. If anything, it will make you feel worse. So tell your spouse how you feel and let them know what your needs are. They might just not know, and maybe they will try a little harder to fulfill your needs.